


when I pee is fieri

by asseatjustintimberlake



Category: Guy fieri - Fandom
Genre: Book 4: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:34:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22164133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asseatjustintimberlake/pseuds/asseatjustintimberlake
Summary: This is a fan fiction of guy fieri I will be adding more chapters and yeah
Relationships: sexing - Relationship
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	when I pee is fieri

**Author's Note:**

> Hi sex

Chapter 1: a sticky situation  
"babe wheres my genital thrush cream i need it before I go to work?!" guy yelled from downstairs  
I was still sopping wet from the occurrences of last nights... Tomfoolery and squeezed my cervix together in delight as I felt ranch dressing drip down slowly to my thighs. I was already horny. Even hearing guys sexy brutish voice made me cling to the bedsheets like I was kneading dough.  
"uhhhmgmdmmm.. I think its next to your diapers in the bathroom" I lied, wanting him to come upstairs and see me with a meatball sub spread out on my tits. I always made myself a feast for guy. I loved the feeling of being his food, he would lick up all the greasy rememants pausing at my belly button and slurping all of the grease out, tickling me with his goatee. I waited for him to come upstairs and rubbed some barbecue sauce on my ass cheeks to achieve full flavour town potential.. Fuck it, flavour city.

Guy grumbled and started to come upstairs, just the mere thought of all his burly weight balancing on the wooden planks made my nipples harder than the banister. Imagine being those stairs... Imagine guy stepping on you with all his weight, you look up and see nothing but his huge bulbous gut staring back at you erectly. I managed to calm myself down when I noticed the burning sensation of the barbecue sauce... No... This couldn't be the chill one, could it? Once guy entered the room I was distracted from his slightly concerned disposition as he saw me in obvious discomfort scratching at my taint under the duvet while I had cheeto puffs crammed in my mouth.  
"baby... I told you to wait until I got home from w- what the fuck are you doing?"  
"ACKKKKKK ACK REIIIIIIIK EEEEEEEEEEE" I shrieked, rolling around in the now crushed up pringles and squelching meatballs from the sub. I could barely speak the pain was so intense but the thought of my submission as I rolled around like a pig in my own filth and cum made the pain slightly more bareable. Nevertheless,  
"SAUC- SAUCE IN POOnANA" I yelled in a breathless chaos.  
Guy stood still staring at me  
"HOT HOT HOT SAUCE HOT SAUCE IN POON POON POONANA.... OOOG POOOANAN HOT IN HOLE HOT IN HOLE" I finally managed to scream, thrashing around as I scratched my bare ass hole and tore the now covered in ranch and barbecue sauce sheets off the king-sized bed.  
I think guy got the message because he rushed to the bathroom to get water but just as he was about to throw it directly into my gaping ass hole out shot a hefty load of liquified diahhrea. It squinted allover his hair and made him look like a rather pissed off Hitler as it dripped out from his nostrils. "WWEEATER WATER IN POONANA HOT HEET HA" I continued to yell, snatching the bucket of water from his clammy hands and throwing it over my ass. As the water dripped down into the clumps of shit on the bedsheets our eyes locked in a moment of silence.  
"can I taste? " he murmered, sliding a finger into the shit and placing it on his tongue. His eyes lit up,  
"tastes like burger" he shrieked and dove his face into the bedsheets, snufflijg at it like a pig. I couldn't hold back and let out a earth shattering  
"OHHHH YEAH" as I grappled hold of his ass cheek and slapped it so hard he made bubbles with the shit which I then popped and giggled.  
"shit bubbles" he whispered, staring into my eyes and our lips locked and i ran my fingers through his gelled hedgehog like hair.  
I yearned to trace my fingers down his oily chest, tangling them in his ramen noodle like hairs and smelling his strong onion scent, like a noodle packet. Speaking of noodles I had one I wanted to suck of my own...  
I dragged him down on top of me and before we could kiss, held his lips together before saying  
"jiggly joe" and pinching his ear.  
"oo baby baby oo baby bahy oo oo OO" he sung out as my nails dug into his cakey ear wax and I licked them clean, winking at him.  
It was then that I unbottoned guys ripped Calvin's with my teeth and stuck my hand in to find his beautiful cheeto shaped dong, it was small but if you flapped it around enough it sometimes hit my clit,or as he liked to call it "mini kidney bean"  
I pulled it out and closed my lips around it, doing raspberries on his millions sized balls as he giggled in delight  
He grabbed a hold of my hair and I moaned as he caressed the left over chicken nuggets from last night in it, when he peed in my mouth I swallowed it and said  
"now it is time for the sexing baby boo" and pulled the cheeto towards me so fast he squealed in pleasure.  
"can I put it in barbecue hole" he whispered, smiling down at me.  
I looked into his rat like eyes and said "yeah I'm ready for ur huge monster penis"  
He giggled in delight and placed the cheeto inside. I pretended to enjoy it as he flapped around on top of me like a dolphin, the majority of the time it wasn't even in, and I think he started Russian dancing on my leg at one point. By the time he had pissed the second time (there was some blood so I know he enjoyed it) it was 3am and he had missed work. I snuggled up in his flaky armpit and looked up into his glistening eyes, shivering as I felt his pudgy finger pushing my hair behind my ear. Pure ecstacy.  
"babe can we get married"  
"yes baby boo"  
"ok we marry now"  
"ok"  
"can I have sprit"  
"I love you baby"  
...  
"I love sprit"

**Author's Note:**

> Sexing... Mmmmm... Sex


End file.
